Sergei Kourdakov, a former KGB agent and Soviet naval intelligence officer, defected from the USSR at the age of twenty. A year later we met at my Federal Government office in Washington DC. We were watched and followed. “Even you could be spy,” Sergei whispered. My book, A Rose for Sergei, is the true story of our time together.

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Second Chances


I recently had an email discussion with my brother Keith and his wife Carole regarding writing.  I mentioned to them that writing A Rose for Sergei and even writing a blog were definitely out of my comfort zone, but I would continue to write anyway.  I felt I needed to write about Sergei Kourdakov before it was too late.  In reality I meant before I was too old.  I commented that the reason I wanted to write about Sergei is because I know I would have regretted not writing about him . . . and one should have no regrets in life.
 
Regrets can be categorized in different ways.  One is the type of regret where you don’t have any choice in the results.  Another type of regret is where you do have a choice but you fail to follow through, and decide to do nothing.  That is the type of regret I was referring to.  The one where you say years later, “I should have done this,” or “I wish I had said that.” 
 
Carole* blogs about life experiences and her response from the discussion was poignant, “I truly understand your comment about working outside your comfort zone and at the same time knowing that this is what you are supposed to do.  I can't say that I have ‘no regrets’ in life.  But all the choices that I made have brought me to this point, and it's a very good place.”
 
That response made me think long and hard.  Yes, I will say that I also have regrets.  Those regrets do shape our lives and we learn from them, hopefully for the better.
 
My wish for my blog readers is this:  If you know you have any regret that you can change, because you have a choice, then change it now.  I wouldn’t recommend writing a book for everyone because I am finding it takes a tremendous amount of time and energy.  Maybe all you need to do is make a simple phone call or email someone so years later you won’t have to say, “I wish I had done . . . .”  Whatever it is, make that choice and make it happen.
 
Sometimes you get a second chance.

 
*Read Carole’s blog and watch for her forthcoming book:
http://caroleduff.wordpress.com/about/

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