Sergei Kourdakov, a former KGB agent and Soviet naval intelligence officer, defected from the USSR at the age of twenty. A year later we met at my Federal Government office in Washington DC. We were watched and followed. “Even you could be spy,” Sergei whispered. My book, A Rose for Sergei, is the true story of our time together.

Monday, January 4, 2016

Sergei Kourdakov - January 1


In the early morning hours of January 1, even in my deepest sleep, I’m startled awake.  It is the same time each year.  And I know.  Sometime after midnight, forty-three years ago, a shot was fired and Sergei Kourdakov fell to the floor.  One fatal gunshot wound to the head.  I was more than 2000 miles away at the time, but uneasiness had nagged me during the days leading up to that very night.  Did I by some means sense that, when we parted for the holidays, it would be the last time I would ever see Sergei alive?  I block those memories from my mind each year, or at least I try to do that, as I prepare for the holidays.  But somehow those thoughts find me.  I don’t think I’ll ever truly know what happened that night.





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2 comments:

  1. UnknownJanuary 22, 2016 at 7:19 PM

    I am so sorry. :( That must be terrible. Sergei's life lives on from his book- and yours. Thank you for keeping his memory for us.

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    1. Kolleen KiddJanuary 25, 2016 at 8:55 AM

      Emily, thank you for your kind words. I never thought I would be the one to keep Sergei's memory alive by writing a book about him. Life does work in mysterious ways! :)

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